A few months ago I was out for drinks with a friend and we were discussing dating. He was encouraging me to get back out there, but with my job having quite unsociable hours it is tricky to meet the love of my life. I have tried dating sites and just found they ripped off vulnerable people constantly asking you for more money the further you move along the online dating food chain. He suggested that well know Swipe Left or right dating app.
“I am not in it for a booty call. I am serious and will be keeping my legs firmly closed on the first date.” I insisted.
After he wiped up the beer that he spat out at me. He ensured me that it is not just about booty calls and he has gone on dates with girls that haven’t ended the night with a wham bam thank you mam.
So I join up and my friend chooses my five photos and away we go. Swiping away. More left than right. Standard. I am incredible fussy after all.
After a few days pass there are four guys that I quite like to look of and have been talking to. The usual groundwork conversation about what they do, where they are from, how their weekend was. A few days pass and not one of them has asked me out on a date. Further days passed and the same daily conversations go on. How was work? What are you plans this evening? But no sign of actually meeting face to face.
Well over a week now, so I ask one of them about meeting up for a drink. He says he is free Thursday 7th January. (It is the 2nd December when I ask). Blank.
Later that evening one of the guys finally asks me out that Friday. Win. On Thursday I get a message from him saying he has double booked himself and Friday is off. The next free night is in two weeks time. Free night? What about a 20 min coffee pre work or on your way to football practice. Fine, your choice.
A few days pass and he begins texting more and more frequently, asking more and more personal questions. Some questions I haven’t even discussed the answer with my best friend. I’m intrigued to find out why, basically a complete strange thinks it is acceptable for another stranger to tell them their deepest darkest secrets before meeting and knowing if or if not there is a connection. Has the world of social media and putting everything out there from behind a screen really gone that far? Is it to much to meet and actually ask these questions in person and over time? Interesting.
The personal questions keep coming and more and more texts arriving. (At times I’m confused to how someone can type that fast of reply). A robot? A bored computer hacker? Or just a lonely loser?
I don’t give any more that what I would put on the internet away to him. He could be a raving bunny boiler for all I know.
Two weeks pass. Two weeks of me replying one or two word answers or not replying at all. I do not mention our attempt at date number two at all in this time. He then informs me that he is busy and it will have to be in the New Year. Oh dear, what a shame. Block.
I revisit the app for a third time lucky attempt. I begin talking to a personal trainer who has a lot of similar interests and a good sense of humor. As much as I can tell through the screen of my iPhone. After three days I suggest meeting, thinking I am learning from past mistakes. He also gives me a date, in 3 weeks time. Third time unlucky more like.
Three weeks pass and I get a naked photo of the PT with the comment ‘Look what your missing out on.’ Hilariously he is tiny not just in his man hood but general body size. I’m more a chunky mans man, kind of girl.
Who do these fella’s think they are? Or what are they scared of? Prolonging to dating app messages isn’t going to make meeting for the first time incredible awkward any easier. It will always be horrific, best to get it over and done with sooner rather than later in my opinion. Like ripping off a plaster.
With the dating app I have given up swiping and instead deleted everything. Considering just meeting someone in the real world and not the cyber world. Retro, right?!
Am I that single girl who swipes left and right?