I love clichés. Can’t get enough enough of ‘em. Not because I am unoriginal and can’t come up with my own words to say– well, at least I hope that’s not the case– but for the truth that lies within them.
As a writer, I find the truth in worn-out phrases coming up time and time again as a theme in my fiction. There’s a reason, my subconscious seems to be telling me, that in times of crisis– the time when we wish we could reach for some meaningful expression to convey
our deepest angst or sympathy or heartbreak– the only thing we can come up with to say is the likes of “when life hands you lemons, make lemonade.” Ouch. Smack to the forehead. Why, cruel world, why?
Well, I’m a go with the flow kind of gal, so if all these clichés flood my mind, for better or or worse, I’m just going to take it and run. (Surely, there must be a prize for fitting the most clichés into one sentence?)
What does all of this have to do with breakups?
Well, for one: laughter is good for healing the heart and while I may not have made you laugh out loud, I hope I’ve tickled
your funny bone ever-so-slightly. Secondly, I believe it is for the very truth contained in these tired platitudes that they become, well, worn out, like a child’s favorite blankie: raggedy and cherished at the same time. With that in mind, here are some of my favorite clichés on breakups and the advice they hold for healing your heart.
How to Get Over a Breakup; It’s Cliché Because it Works
1) A friend in need is a friend indeed.
Reconnect with a sibling, a long-lost cousin, or an old friend. A broken heart can be warmed by the love of those dearest to us. Just having lunch together or sitting quietly on a park bench can bring companionship that leads to healing.
2) Work on yourself.
While going through my most recent breakup, the last thing I had emotional energy for was a new class– meeting new people, trying new skills.
However, in retrospect, the hours I spent learning to swing dance were invaluable to my healing. They got me out of my pity party, even though sometimes only outwardly. Years later, I am still in contact with some of my fellow students whose kindness in a dark time meant so much. Plus, I danced out of that studio with a new set of skills that, when I was ready, helped to bring the right kind of people into my life.
3) Everything happens for a reason.
Trust that life comes together the way it’s supposed to. It’s easy to become bitter or wish you could turn back time to change the breakup. Believe me, I’ve been there too. But for every wish that things had turned out differently, once time passed and my heart healed a bit, I could see that ultimately that broken relationship wasn’t the right match for me.
4) When it’s the right time, it’ll happen.
I hated hearing this one while healing. Nevertheless, like 99.9% of clichés, it’s also true. It is possible, when the time is right, to meet a partner who is well-suited to you. So don’t fret about finding love again or that you’ll never meet someone as (sexy/ intelligent/ funny/fill-in-the-blank) as your ex. It will happen. Just give yourself time– which may just be the most cliché, and apt, of them all.
Annalisa Parent (annalisaparent.com) is a writer living in Vermont. She was interviewed this year by the Huffington Post Live for her dating blog sassyspinster.com.