As someone who has read a lot, and I mean a lot, of on-line profiles I wanted to share with you my thoughts on what makes a good profile and what does not.
Don’t get me wrong my online profile is not perfect but I try to follow my own advice and make it as honest, bubbly, fun and as interesting as I can because that is who I am.
Here are my Top Tips:
#1 Honest. Be honest, in every part of your profile, it really is that simple.
#2 Photos. Always include photos on your profile, one of the most annoying things about profiles is photo-less profiles, this is on-line dating not blind date. You can see me, it is only fair that I should be able to see you in return.
There is no excuse for not having a photo on your profile, in my opinion. Excuses I have had include “there are too many nosey people on here”, “people from my workplace might see me”, “I am a private person”, “my phone won’t let me upload any”, “I need to be discreet as I am not single”. They are all excuses, none are acceptable.
Always use recent photos of yourself. If you are serious about dating then you are going to actually, physically, meet people, why frustrate them by turning up not looking like the photos on your profile.
Use a variety of photos, not just one selfie, show yourself in a variety of situations, doing things you enjoy and for goodness sake smile.
If possible use full length and close up photos too. That way people get to see all of you.
Selfies are fine, I have selfies on my profile, but why do men favour a mirror selfie? This is not a good look and rarely makes you look attractive.
Lots of people use images and quotes on their profiles, again I do not understand why, I do not care if you hate Monday mornings, I want to see you.
Group photos or photos with your children should not be used as your main profile picture, and absolutely do not use a photo with a woman if you are a man or vice versa, most of us automatically assume this is your ex. I want to see you in that first picture no-one else.
#3 Text. Write something, anything, profiles that have “…..”, “xxx” or “ask” written in the Interests and About Me boxes seriously disappoint me. Tell me about you, it doesn’t have to be war and peace but something to get me interested is a good start. I can start a conversation from what you write, learn a little about you and your personality. You don’t have to write it as a job application or a sales pitch, it’s not Littlewoods catalogue.
#4 Hook. My friends told me from the beginning to have a hook in my profile, something that people can comment on or suggest. Mine used to be box-set suggestions, now I have 2 photos with captions asking people to name the stadium and/or the car in the background of my fun selfies.
A hook really does work and is a great ice breaker, it is a bit of fun, and again another good way to show off your personality.
#5 Interests. Surely you have more interests than gym, friends/family and watching tv, if I have read this on one profile I have read it on hundreds. It doesn’t have to be an endless list of things, something you do every day or are obsessive about but a varied list of interests gives me as a reader clues to the type of person you are and is somewhere to start a conversation from.
#6 Children. This may be controversial, and I apologise, but if you do have children please do not write in your opening line that they are the centre of your world and always come first. I am not a parent but I already know this, of course they are, it goes without saying, the fact that you have said that has put me off instantly. Use a photo with you children if you want, but do not have it as your main profile picture.
I would and have dated men with children, when you get to my age it is hard to find people who don’t have them but you are looking to date, you are not trying to win a father or mother of the year award.
#8 Back again. Never say on your profile that you are back on the dating website again. Many of us have been on and off, some like yo-yo’s, no-one minds and this does not make a catchy headline.
#9 Prefer not to say. Whoever invented these websites and gave people this option, please remove it.
You either have a car or you don’t, you drink or you don’t, you have children or you don’t. When you select prefer not to say it gives me the impression that you are hiding something.
#10 Headlines. Make it catchy, short, sharp and fun. “?”, “:-)”, “Back again” and “Deleting this soon” are immediate turn offs for me and bad examples of dating headlines.
Use your imagination, get a friend to write one for you, copy one you like from a profile you have read.
On-line profiles are varied, there are good ones and bad ones, in my opinion there are more bad than good. None of us have the perfect profile but the key as I say is to be honest and have fun with it, just make sure and put some effort in to it.
Follow me on Twitter to see some of the highlights of my on-line dating experiences @Dating_Sharing and read my blog at www.datingsharingconfessions.com
Hi, I’m Gail, a strong willed and confident independent woman who has been single for 2 and half years, following a 10 year relationship which included 6 months of marriage. I am closer to 40 than I want to be, divorced, and thoroughly enjoying my single life. I would describe myself as a tomboy at heart but I always, always have my nails done. I have no children but do have 2 cats, I’m a professional, career minded individual, and I own my own home and drive a nice car. I credit my new life to the fact that my ex-husband walked out unexpectedly, I am a stronger, better person for it and happier now than I have ever been. It also means that my standards are very high so the man I commit to will need to be perfect, in the meantime I am having fun kissing a lot of frogs to find my Prince. I do not drink alcohol, good or bad I always have the sober view of life and dating. I love eating out, socialising with friends, going for coffee, girlie lunches and of course on dates. I have a variety of hobbies including photography, swimming, reading, gardening, DIY, sports watching (motorsports, football, tennis, golf), box sets (if there’s a box set to be watched I have seen it or it’s on my to watch list, a true sign of single life!) and I go to the cinema regularly. Over the last 12 months, since dipping my toe into the world of online dating, I have become a self-confessed serial online dater; my friends think I should write a book on the subject. I have met all sorts of men, few have managed to reach date 2 I’d like to note, I even committed to 1 for a grand total of 7 weeks (an eternity for me). Most of my attached friends live their single lives through me; I am of course happy to carry this responsibility. Over this time I have learnt a lot about men, women and myself, both physically and mentally. I am here to share my experiences, knowledge, thoughts, issues, ideas and the rollercoaster that is my online dating. I regularly tweet about my experiences, @Dating_Sharing and have very recently started a blog (maybe I will write that book after all) www.datingsharingconfessions.com.