It’s finally happened for you! After countless “swipe rights” and endless coffee dates you’ve finally found “your person”. The person you believe to be the missing lid to your pot. Your masterpiece! You’ve been single and independent for so long that you’ve almost forgotten what it feels like to be in a real romantic relationship. Please do yourself a favor and don’t ruin it! If you don’t want to keep this new flame going here are three easy steps on how to ruin it.
Involve every single person you know in your relationship. Sure go ahead and tell your Mother, your best friend who you rarely speak to (but gave the title to years ago), your co-workers, and finally your caring yet oh-so nosy neighbor. Involve everyone in your fabulous date details, your relationship disagreements, and let’s not forget your amazing energizer bunny sex life. Stop right there! By giving outsiders a front row seat into your relationship you’re setting yourself up for what would be known as a disaster. Not every detail should be discussed. Your private matters and battles you should be fought together to strengthen your bond. Plus not everyone will be thrilled about your new relationship and their poisonous advice could ruin your happiness.
Don’t be considerate! Your world is and will always be the focus. Your time, your goals, and whatever else it is you feel that’s more important than sharing in your partner’s life as well. Don’t think about their time, schedule, or life! In your new relationship you’re the only one that matters. Try going this route and you’ll find yourself exactly where you started. Back on a dating app!
Act way too cool! Yap you’ve got it! Keep your Facebook status to single, don’t post any of their pictures, and act like you’re still dating multiple people. It’s ok if you’re not because you still need to act cool, so you don’t appear like you’re actually falling for this person. Don’t answer their text messages right away even if your phone is glued to your hand as always. Please don’t answer their call either! Acting way too cool, like this person actually doesn’t matter to you will eventually have them thinking they don’t! Soon it will be goodbye you! Guess what? You can be cool all by yourself again!
Your assignment will be to do the complete opposite to keep your new relationship alive. Now that you know how to ruin a perfectly good relationship in three easy steps please avoid these mishaps! Try keeping your relationship to yourself for a change, be considerate, and don’t act too cool! You deserve an amazing relationship!
He’s too this or too that! She’s too short or too fat! They’re too old or too young! Too smart or just too dumb! Ah yes the dreaded list! The list we were told to create and then release to the universe and BOOM! Mr. or Mrs. Right is served. Enough already! How many of us create lists for almost every single aspect of our lives? We create a list to remember the things we need to do, so that we don’t forget the things we need to do. We create lists to go grocery shopping. Well let’s wait a minute here. We need that list or we might forget we’re out of alcohol. It’s a New Year and I’m sure some of you have already started to make your “New Year New Me” lists and goals. There is absolutely nothing wrong with using a list as a guide to help you stay on track when achieving your goals. Although, when it comes to dating and relationships here are three reasons why you might want to throw “the list” away.
Throwing away your list doesn’t mean you lower your standards: Standards and lists are not created equal. Standards are completely healthy, and should be your guide in the dating world. When creating our lists sometimes we’re leading from the superficial “I” only level. He needs to make six figures, drive a new car, and have a nine-inch penis. Does he really ladies? Let’s not forget about the gents who want perky breasts, legs of a stallion, and she must cook seven days a week. Setting character standards and not ego-based lists will allow you to date with a healthy purpose. Create a list based on qualitative stats and not quantitative ones.
Sadly, your list is keeping you single:
Some of us are single by choice. There are times in our lives when being single is the best thing we can do for ourselves. Not everyone has to be in a relationship to feel complete. I’m not talking to those people right now. I’m talking to those who know that the list they’ve created was designed by them to keep love at bay and keep their guards up. If years go by, and you’re still following the list you created five years ago we have a problem. Hopefully by now you’re not the same person you were when you sat down on that one lonely and rainy night to write it. In 2016 it’s not helping you find the love you need and crave. It’s keeping you from seeing all the available people around you because it’s an old, out-dated, and downright egotistical list. Let it go and let love in.
When you lead from your heart you don’t need a list:
Seeing people for who they truly are will eliminate the need for following your list. Love isn’t something that you order, and Chef Cupid isn’t baking up a masterpiece romance dish for you in passion kitchen. Allowing yourself to remain open and accepting can actually lead you to a greater love. By following your list you may have missed the gorgeous beauty you see every day in passing, but because she has tattoos you’re not going to ask her out. Deviating from your list will help you to try something excitingly new and different.
So out with the old and in with the new! Throw away the list and lead from your heart! Happy New Year!
Love! Love! Love!
The four letter word that is more than just a word. It’s a noun, an intense feeling, and verb all rolled into one. It can add to your life, or for some turn you into a bitter and unrecognizable person due to the heartache it has caused. We’re all lucky to be alive in a time where history has been made and written anew! A change has come. The change I am referring to is also known as the “Love Wins” historical movement! Let’s talk about what love wins really means!
If love had a color what would it be?
If love was a gender what would it be? Love needs no labels because it just is! Why? Because love is you, me, and everyone else (yes even the bitter ones) in between. No one should have the right to tell us who, why, or when we should love. Love is more than an erratic emotion, it’s our being. True love knows and has no boundaries. As the saying goes, “If loving you is wrong then I don’t want to be right”! Why? Because love wins!
We’re living in a time where the word divorce is the norm!
And the rates are at an all-time high. Oftentimes when a couple announces their engagement, skeptics and so-called friends secretly jump to the worse conclusions. Placing bets on how soon and when the divorce will take place. Love wins can be a solution to this on-going problem. With love wins we’re allowed to express who we love and why we love on our own terms. Why? Because love wins! Love will always win and we are re-writing the story. There will come a day when we will no longer have to say gay marriage, just marriage. Why? Because love wins! This is what love wins really means! Loving who we want to love just because it’s love! Go out and love bold, loud, and proud! Because you can! Why? Because love will always win!
Sincerely a love wins supporter.
For so many people love and relationships have become an entirely too difficult dream to obtain. Why is it so hard for people to navigate “the successful relationship matrix” in 2015? When entering a new relationship or rekindling an old romance we need to be clear about our intentions. Here are three suggestions to help you check your intentions before getting involved. Intending well (wishing) and actually doing well are two entirely different ideas.
Let honesty be your guide!
We’ve all heard that honesty is the best policy, but are we truly being honest with ourselves and each other? When it comes to having a successful relationship trust and honesty must be at the top of your list. Why did you enter into this relationship? Were you honest with the person in discussing your true intentions? In the beginning our relationships seem to take over every part of our lives. They become more colorful and we start to share our worlds with each other. We must be open and honest with the other person in order to navigate some of the roadblocks relationships face ahead. Don’t wait until you find out what you want to do with your life and then leave this person. Be honest with them, and don’t lead them down a path of doubt and misconceptions.
Stop selling them dreams that you can’t afford yourself!
I don’t believe that we start relationships to ultimately have them end in a not so peaceful manner. When we tell people that we love them, or want to commit to them, and then act a different way this leads to feeling and experiencing betrayal. Playing with someone’s feelings and not being accountable for our actions is completely deceitful. As we all know Karma is more than just a five letter word. If you can’t imagine yourself falling in love with them, or being in a committed relationship then don’t do it. If you’re not ready, or capable of being what you said you could then stop talking. Don’t sell them dreams that you can’t afford to pay for yourself.
Stop stringing them along!
You absolutely know when you’re stringing someone along. You know when you’re heart isn’t invested in them at all, and when you’re holding out for something better to come along. This is an epidemic in the dating world, and a serious challenge that many single people face. You should be more than just an option for someone. You’re a great person. Even with all your faults and peculiar quirks you’re still lovable. Here’s where self love comes into play. Stringing someone along gets you nowhere. Anything can happen while you’re waiting for your knight in shining armor, or your damsel in distress to appear. Don’t try and fill the void of loneliness with someone who you know is only temporary. Let them go. Wish them well and say goodbye. Pull the plug on this less than satisfying going nowhere relationship.
People most certainly may intend well. Life sometimes get in the way of these intentions. If there’s any doubt in your mind about where you see yourself in the future with this person, tell them. When you use honesty, and aren’t sending mixed signals you can’t go wrong. If nothing else you can gain a true friend because you’ve practiced complete disclosure. As always I wish you the best in your dating success!
Are you going down relationship memory lane and thinking about rekindling an old love affair? Stop and ask yourself these five questions first!
Did this person hurt you?
Name one person you know without any imperfections? Right now I’m imagining a million blank stares into space as we all ponder this question. There are no perfect people. In a relationship everything we do affects our partner in some way. Sometimes we hurt each other both intentionally and unintentionally. Which is worse? Think about how you felt when your love was slowly decaying. Do you remember the agony of the separation you had to suffer through? Eventually your sufferings healed with time, but remember what you went through. Does it warrant this person a second chance at your heart? Think about it.
Can you forgive them and ultimately forget the past?
Forgiveness and forgetfulness aren’t the same. If you have chosen to forget but not forgive don’t consider stepping back into this relationship. Every time you two are in relationship bliss you can’t use the wrong doings of the past as ammunition to assassinate your partner. To give round two of this relationship fair chance forgiveness has to be on the menu. You’ve reached a happier place in your life when you’re able to forgive those who have wronged you. Essentially an even higher place when you forgive the one who broke your heart.
Do their actions reflect their words?
You may have heard “once a cheater always a cheater”. Some may argue that in most cases this is true. Are there exceptions to the rule? Yes. How can you tell the difference? Action! Anyone can tell you exactly what they believe you’ve been waiting to hear, but only a few will show you by their actions. Does this person call when they say they’re going to call? Are they late or don’t even bother showing up to your dates? Their actions will unveil their true intentions.
Can you imagine your life without them in it?
How long has it been since you two separated? What have you learned about yourself since the demise of this relationship? What don’t you like about your life without them in it now? If you honestly can’t spend another minute without them, don’t! If you can imagine your life without them for good, then don’t turn back the hands of time. Why bother? You’re doing great. Keep moving forward.
What does your heart truly want?
Think about how children can play make believe for hours on end and never grow tired. They’re laughing, running, and drawing all because that’s what their heart’s desire. No need for responsibility or dreading Monday mornings. Pure bliss! Have you gotten clear about what you truly desire? Is this the right thing for you to do at this time? When logic ways you down and you can no longer reason your way out, it’s time to let your heart make the decision. It’s your friend. It’s there for a reason. Love wins!
If you’ve answered no to more than one of these questions then don’t look back. Keep marching forward! On the other hand if you’re persistent enough, completely true in professing your love for this person, and are willing to do what it takes to win them back then go right ahead. You’ll have to be extraordinary this time because you’ll want to seal the deal. There are exceptions to the rule, but only if you decide to become one. Occasionally there are times in love and relationships when people deserve a second chance.
Think about it first! Good luck!
When you were younger you used toys to transform you into a world of imagination and make believe. You spent hours playing with dolls or action figures pretending to be Barbie or GI Joe. As you grew older toys lost their wanderlust and adulthood took over. That is until now! Here are 16 ways that sex toys will enhance your sex life!
- A couple that plays together stays together! Introducing sex toys to the bedroom will add some serious spice to your dull “only waiting until the weekend” sex routine. Swings aren’t just for playgrounds!
- How about a little mutual masturbation? Add a little vibrating c-ring and clitoral vibrator (i.e. bullet) to your genital massages and watch some serious fireworks occur.
- Studies have shown that women in relationships use sex toys more often than single women? Why is that? If you don’t use it you’ll lose it. Sexual desire that is. Work those erotic muscles single ladies. Don’t wait for Prince Charming to get you off!
- You can go from 0 to 60 in 2.5 seconds. Sex toys help to stimulate and awaken you to the pleasant sensations of particular erogenous zones. The male and female G-spot can both be reached by using a G-spot penetrating sex toy.
- Nothing says I love you quite like oral sex! Add an edible lubricant to a male masturbation sleeve followed by your nice warm tongue and send him into pleasure heaven.
- Skype sex is the new phone sex! Skype-sexing or FaceTiming while using your vibrator raises the kink in long distance loving to a whole new level.
- Blindfolds and surprises! Blindfold your lover and use a seduction feather tickler to follow down their spine and send them into satisfaction overdrive.
- Yes, a paddle can be used as a sex toy with delightful punishment! Tap into your inner dominatrix! Wear some leather and go to town.
- Dealing with conflicting libidos? If your lover doesn’t last as long as you would like them to a sex toy can help finish the job. Don’t leave her hanging gents. A nice clitoral stimulator will help in multiple ways.
- Ladies, having a bullet in your toy chest is like having a black dress in your closet. No matter where you go it will always make you look and feel fabulous. Simple yet powerful and effective.
- Sex toys can help prevent STD’s. Using your dildo, sleeve, or clitoral massager before you go out can ease some built up sexual tension. The goal here is to help prevent unnecessary one-night stands.
- Want to try anal play, but are too scared? Using anal beads or butt plugs can help introduce you to a pleasurable erogenous zone. You can create your own beginners guide to anal with these two toys.
- Using a lubricant with your toys will also help turn them into an adult Slip ‘N Slide. Splash!
- Sex toys help you create a fantasy world where you and your lover get lost in an oasis of climatic memories. Bring a toy or two on vacation. Add some adventure and fantasy to your repertoire!
- In a dating and sex drought? Your sex toy will always be a loyal companion. It’s not going anywhere unless you run out of batteries. It’s always one orgasm away!
- Using a sex toy can help assist you in the wonderful world of self-pleasure. Finding out what you like and what turns you on is extremely important in being a phenomenal lover. Using a sex toy will help you find your specific sweet spots.
Sex toys are completely fun and delightful. They can take your sex life from a 7 to a 10 in a matter of minutes! Don’t knock it until you try it! Have a question about which toy is right for you? Visit allthingscuteetc.com to explore!
Have you ever been to an in-home party presentation? You know the types that show you everything from clothing to Tupperware in your living room? Well I’m the new-aged version of this Tupperware lady. Only my Tupperware vibrates, causes extreme pleasure, and if need be gets you pregnant! I’ve been a Passion Parties consultant for six years. Talking about sex will never get old. Over the years my parties have gifted me a crash course in dating, sex, and relationships. I want to share with you 3 major components (what I call the 3 C’s) needed to make first time sex with your new love an amazingly pleasurable experience!
Sex is a powerful tool used to expand and deepen connection with another. You’ve been dating for awhile, and if you’re not one who wants to wait until marriage then sex is probably next on your list. If you want to be a great lover and not just a good one you’ll need to feel an all-around connection with this person (mental and physical folks). Having an amazing connection with someone will increase your desire for them. You’ll be thinking about their pleasure as much, or if not more than your own. Spending time together in all sorts of settings will allow you to grow and cultivate a meaningful connection. Your job here is to make them forget about anyone else they’ve ever been with. Connection is a must in having mind-blowing first time sex with your new love!
You must be confident in your own skin to be a great lover. Loving the way you look naked (no matter the size) will help your lover enjoy your beautiful body as well. Self care is essential in boosting your confidence. Ladies, say thank you! Hopefully by now you’ve done a good job of letting him know he’s your “Mr. Awesome”! When he pays you a compliment, don’t shy away or
refuse it. Take it! Agree with him and thank him on his impeccable taste! Gents, shower her with compliments. Tell her what you love and can’t wait to do to her body. Make her feel special. After all flowers require water to grow!
Ladies, if you can’t verbally ask for what you want then let his fingers do the job. Studies have shown that over 75% of women need clitoral stimulation to orgasm! That’s a huge majority of women. Meanwhile the other 25% only wants you to breathe on them and “cum” nation begins (lucky gals). Odds are you’re either one, or dating a 75 percentile woman! So ladies, let his fingers be your interpreter! Guide them to where you’d like them to be. Gents do her a favor and pay attention to where she is leading you. Don’t be in such a rush that you miss this golden opportunity. Round of applause to the women who know how to ask for what they want (you’ve been to one of my parties)! Once you’ve mastered the finger strokes you can now graduate to using your tongue! If you’re a man who isn’t afraid of Vagina feel free to jump right in! We salute you! If she doesn’t like it or says no to cunnilingus more communication is needed. Help her to “unleash the beast”! Need I say more? I believe you can take it from here.
Use the 3 C’s as your blueprint! Passionate sex with your new love is around the corner!
You’ve survived a difficult break-up, and now you’re back on the dating scene. Finally your “I’m single and ready to mingle” game face is on! You’ve heard countless stories from your friends about their dates from hell. Let’s face it you only get one chance for a second date. Here are the top 6 first date fails and how to avoid them!
You’re running late!
Actually, you’re extremely late! You’re completely rushing because you’ve mismanaged your time by staying on Twitter way too long, and now you have to scurry to get there on time. Traffic sucks! We all have these problems, but no one wants to hear the lame excuse “I was stuck in traffic”. Listen, first impressions are everything. What do you think you’re telling your date by running late? If you want to score a second date, some “nookie”, or a potential relationship avoid being late! Set your alarm ahead of time. Program your Tivo or DVR to record the rest of your show and move right along! You never know you could be going on a date with Cinderella, so don’t be late!
It’s a blind date and you don’t like what you see!
So your friend has this bright idea to set you up with one of their co-workers. You trust your friend and have completely opted out of spying on your blind dates Facebook page beforehand. You arrive at the restaurant and notice you’re now sitting across the table from Shrek! Now some may argue that physical attraction isn’t the most important element when it comes to a long-lasting relationship. I’m here to tell you it’s an essential and very important element initially! It’s perfectly fine if you’re not one who tends to find beauty in every person you meet. Gracefully bow out of the date. Nicely apologize and leave a tip for the waiter. Don’t waste your time if you don’t feel a tingly sensation coming from your genitals. No one wants to wake up to Shrek for the rest of their lives.
It’s very important to look your best when meeting a potential Mr. or Mrs. Right. Ladies, you can be both sexy and classy at the same time. I would advise you to stay away from placing the “twins” on display. If you can’t resist the urge it’s ok if you find a blouse that lets them play “peek-a-boo” or “hide and seek”. Try to avoid any slippage. Gents, all shirts aren’t created equal if you want to show off your muscles great, but make sure it fits. No “Smediums” please!
You’ve reached the point of no return, and you keep asking questions that were previously answered. You’re not listening because you’re not being stimulated. At this point don’t start to blabber about yourself. You can either change the scenery fast or end the date. If you change the atmosphere (go for a walk) a new topic may arise. If it doesn’t you two don’t have enough in common. Cut your losses and move on.
You drank way too much!
I get it! You’re nervous, excited, and well it’s Friday! No! Stop there! Drinking way too much on a first date is a disaster waiting to happen. You may end up saying and/or doing something you’ll regret. It’s perfectly fine to have a glass of wine or a beer to take the nervous edge off, but please don’t get carried away and binge drink just because you can Uber. Do yourself a favor and say no to alcohol this time. Too many mishaps can occur!
Your credit card gets denied!
If you agree to pay for the date or at least your half make sure you have enough to cover the tab. Who enjoys being stuck with an unexpected bill? Some women will always expect a man to pay. Meanwhile other women don’t mind going dutch. You have to be prepared for both types on a first date (ladies you too). Your card being denied for any reason other than technical issues will tell your date a lot about you. Don’t go to an extravagant restaurant with Starbucks money. Get creative. Set up a picnic instead.
Some of us had to fail, so you don’t have to!
Best of luck,
Every sport has a playbook and dating is no different. Singles everywhere now have the choice to “swipe right” if they think you’re hot and want a date. You’ll need to be ready for any and all situations where meeting someone significant is at stake. Here are 10 plays that will help singles conquer the dating game.
Use any tool (i.e. hair, posture, and smile) possible to achieve this wonderful act of playfully communicating with whomever you come in contact with. You’ll become quite comfortable with flirting the more you practice. Smile and appear to be an interesting person. You’ll get the attention of an admirer.
Make sure at all times that you’re well groomed. Nails need to be clean, cut, or manicured. Have at least one go-to outfit for accepting a last minute party invitation or date. It should make you feel special.
Master at least one dance move that goes with a variety of music, so that when the time comes you’ll look like a pro! Dancing with the Stars anyone?
Know at least one great joke:
We’ve all heard that laughter is the best medicine. Women adore men who can make them laugh, so having at least one great joke to tell is a plus. Be able to tell it anywhere. Make sure it’s a clean one, or tastefully naughty.
A 30 second commercial:
Be able to tell a bit about yourself in 30 seconds or less. Something interesting that makes us want to turn the page of your book. Practice saying it in the mirror first.
How to answer the “why are you single” question:
If you’re a great person who happens to be single you will get this question often. Especially if you let friends and family know you’re single and ready to date. Don’t be a “Debbie Downer” when answering this. Let people know what you’ve achieved while being single.
Know how to properly ask someone out:
This is crucial! Don’t do this over text message. The ability to ask for what you want will help you excel in all areas of your life. Women don’t be afraid to ask men out either. Example: “You seem like an amazing person, and I’d like to get to know more about you. Do you happen to be free on ____ or ___ at this time?” Narrow down their choices. If they’re interested you’ll have a “yes” within a few seconds. All they can say is no. Next!
The ability to know when someone isn’t interested:
It’s ok if that person doesn’t see how fabulous you are. As a single person we sometimes ask ourselves, “What’s wrong with me?” There’s nothing wrong with you because you’re single! The timing may not be right. Moving on is an art you’ll need to master as a single and fabulous dater!
Don’t take it personal:
In the dating game you’ll win some and lose some. Not taking things personally will benefit you in more ways than one. You’ll strike out a few times, kiss a couple of toads, and have to swipe your credit card to pay for a crappy first date. Don’t get discouraged! You’re actually one step closer to meeting someone great.
Never leave home in a bad mood:
It’s very important as a single person to know that even when you don’t think you’re looking to meet someone you actually are. People are attracted to those enjoying life. Running a mundane errand can turn into a chance encounter of meeting someone spectacular. Be ready to smile and mingle. Leave the moodiness to the bitter singles! Check your attitude at the door.
Use these 10 plays as your singles playbook and win! I’d love to hear from you!