3 Hottest Things to Say During Phone Sex

“What are you wearing?”

This is the typical way that those who want to have phone sex get things started. But maybe it’s time you spice it up a bit with some more creative ideas. Are you in a bit of rut with your partner and need an injection of hotness for your next call? Try these three things to say during phone sex.

Nothing

Of course, you don’t want to sit there in silence. There needs to be sound, but maybe there doesn’t need to be words throughout the whole call. Moaning, grunting, and letting the phone go where the noises are can be extremely arousing. Put the phone down and let her listen to you imagine being inside of her while you lube up and start stroking. Or turn on some toys and start playing.

Think about finding a public space where you can still have some privacy and get yourself off over the phone. Just hearing the sounds of the streets or nature along with your moaning gives a different perspective than just thinking about you home on your couch. Some of the hottest parts of telefetish phone sex calls are when no one is talking at all.

I Won’t Judge You

One of the hottest things you can say to your phone sex partner is something like “I’m not going to judge you, you can say anything.” Once you give someone permission to be themselves without repercussions, then the real sexual desires tend to come out. Sometimes it takes hearing that you are still going to be accepted to truly let loose. This is especially true for women as we have been taught that being sexual and having lusty thoughts is inherently bad. However, that certainly doesn’t keep most women from doing so. Just prepare yourself. You might hear some freaky fantasies, but stick to your word and don’t judge. Let it be.

One Time at Band Camp

Telling someone else the sexual things you have done before, with other people, can be one of the hottest experiences for couples who are really secure in their relationship. Maybe there is a certain memory that will not leave your mind, or a technique someone once tried that sent you through the roof? If you talk about it in advance, you might be surprised to hear that it excites her to think about you with someone else. But play fair, she gets to tell her sexy stories, too.

These scenarios are easy to play out over the phone because you don’t have to think about some fictional story. This is something that actually happened to you so you just need to tell the story in detail. Talk about how someone wanted you and she will feel lucky that she is the one that ends up with you in the end.

Whether you are in a long distance relationship, or want to spice up your work days away from your partner, try these tips to take your phone sex game to the next level and leave both of you wanting more.

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Victims – Beware of Repeat Offenders

Victims - Beware of Repeat Offenders

Narcissism Relationships/Breakups: Part 3 

Narcissists are serial offenders. They need continual replenishment to fill their emptiness. They frequently revisit the wells that previously quenched their thirst. Their prior victims are often eager to oblige.

As Narcissist victims, knowing that we are not alone is no solace.

We are dealing with and living through the aftermath of those revisits in very personal and real pain. It is as though we seek to torture ourselves when we allow the repeat ‘hoovering’ of what Narcs seek that is within us. The love, heart and soul that they lack.

Have you been here?

Anyone in a relationship with a full-blown Narcissist knows what I am talking about. Such a relationship is not characterized by the normal ups and downs of most relationships but by dramatic and relentless upheavals. Many Narcs are addicted to the chaos they create in their lives and the lives of others.

Throughout our ordeal the initial overflowing feelings of being ever so special were tested again and again by the ideal Renaissance Love … the wo/man who pursued us with fervor and rising lust. We were no longer the luckiest person in the world to be so perfect for our Mr/s. Perfects.  Increasingly they made sure we were aware of their displeasure’s with their criticisms and outbursts of anger.

Like a roller coaster, the breathtaking descent began

Abruptly at the very height we had been manipulated to believe would soon arrive. So abruptly were we jolted that we could not accept what was actually happening. How did this special journey we thought we were sharing reverse 180 degrees … and why? When we reached bottom, thankful for reprieve and a chance at redemption, with our Narc at the controls we found ourselves reversed again for no known reason, plunked into the roller coaster seat and buckled in once more.

Totally confused and spent by the devaluation phase of a typical Narc pattern, we allowed them to continue to suck out of us every ounce of what we had to give them. Eventually, with our special fuel depleted, nothing more could be had from us. Time for the giver and destroyer of happiness and trust to move on yet again.

How do we get off such a volatile and frightening roller coaster?

The answer: not easily. Narcissists keep us on the track as long as they can control us and we can be of use to them. As we try to jump off to save our emotional lives and physical well-being (yes, physical ailments start to surface) we are sucked back in by apologies and promises offering glimmers of hope. Narcissists are confident we still love them after all. Just one more ascent we think … this time we will have a gentle happy ending. Or so we naively believe!

The dizzying and dark pattern of a relationship with true Narcissists is idealize, devalue, discard. Their even more devastating returns and repetitions of the cycle with the same ever-hopeful individual while grooming others to be their future victims are inexplicable to patient friends. They wonder how could you let this happen … and more than once.

The answer is quite simple.

If such an experience is the first one for us, we don’t see the individual for who s/he really is until it is too late. Until we are caught in the web of lies and the uncanny ability to manipulate and control us. We want to believe the lies because we love them and the seductive magic they create.

If we are reluctant to share our experiences with our most trusted acquaintances, if we feel ashamed of accepting our Narc back time and time again in spite of some level of hopeful happiness, if our self-esteem suffers, if we are in more emotional pain than pleasure, if we give more than we get, then we must ask ourselves if the relationship is healthy, mutually supportive, and open in every way. If it is not, we then know what to do.

Narcs can sparkle and shine.

Those of us who seek a fulfilling relationship must be vigilant to not establish a self-destructive pattern as the result of attraction to a Narcissist. That attraction can be triggered by our own dysfunctional past. It can be our pattern to resist and conquer.

Do not allow a Narcissist to shadow our positive space. Multiple involvements with Narcs could become a deadly habit. Stress and remorse and shame can affect the body’s systems enough to bring us close to death. Stress comes arm-in-arm with a Narcissist. And stress can kill. Beware.

Joan Barrett
Seasoned Single Joan Barrett navigates the tricky, exciting and challenging Singles lifestyle. Her passion for SINS (her playful term for Singles INternet Dating Services) inspired her to create her category best-selling book Candyland S.I.N.S. to encourage other like-minded Singles who are not about to roll over alone and sit out their remaining years. Life loves people who live it with passion. As an active participant Joan enjoys a deep and broad enough engagement to know the game, how the game is best played and … how not to be played! Yes, ‘online dating’ is the only real game in town.

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Is he cheating on you? Let’s deal it…

Is he cheating on you? Let’s deal it…

Today we are going to speak about cheating… Finding out that your boyfriend is cheating on you can make you lose your sanity and sleep. Before I begin on relationship advice on cheating, let’s understand what are the signs of boyfriend cheating on you.

Signs of cheating

1. Lack of intimacy and deteriorating sex life is one of the first signs. A person who is involved in another a love affair, is most likely to abstain from physical intimacy.

2. The next sign boyfriend is cheating, is emotional distance. Emotional promiscuity or infidelity is the starting point of cheating in a relationship. A cheating partner will stop discussing his fears, hopes, and dreams with you.

3. If your boyfriend is cheating on you, he may get too attached to the virtual world of computers, text messages, and marathon telephonic conversations at ungodly hours. He will be a regular member in virtual chat room and the phone will be buzzing off the hook.

4. Another sign is a drastic change of body language. He will get a complete makeover and transform himself as much as possible to suit the needs of the other person.

How to deal with it

This advice only applies to those girlfriends who have established the fact that they are involved with cheating partners. If you are in the indecisive phase avoid getting at extreme conclusions, taken in an upset state of mind. Maybe it is not what is looks likes.

Accept the Reality

To deal with such a situation, you first need to accept the reality. Understand, that since your boyfriend ‘has been’ cheating on you since sometime now, his act is not a one time thing. Hence, it is now your turn to make a call and move on.

It’s OK

There are many who are caught up in a similar situation. So, you are not alone. Instead of playing the blame game, it would be wise to deal with the situation head-on. It may or may not be your fault, but it doesn’t matter now. Confront your guy about his behavior, which has devastated your relationship.

Avoid Hasty Decisions

An honest relationship advice on cheating is to avoid hasty decisions. He may have cheated on you, but, you need to know that it always takes two to tango. Evaluate your behavior with him and get to the root cause of the problem. Most men crave for attention. He man begins to cheat on his partner, because he feels neglected and uncared for. So, if you aren’t paying any heed to him, his instincts are going to make him look for someone who does. Thus, analyze your relationship and find out what’s going wrong, before you jump to conclusions.

When Situation Goes Out of Hands

Despite warning him and giving him a second chance, if he still does not mend his ways, then, it is best to let it go. It’s never advisable to toe a broken car and drag it along, just because you are emotionally attached. Dragging such a relationship, will also lead to more hurt, cheating, and lying. Parting ways, is the best way of getting over, and moving on from a cheating relationship.

Harriet Brookes

http://dating-news.net/

Harriet Brookes
Harriet is a blogger from Cyprus but currently lives in Rome, Italy. She has professional experience as a blogger at dating news , a columnist in magazines and sites in Italy and Greece. Harriet has a degree in journalism and a degree in cultural management units. Harriet’s hobbies include tennis, travelling and cooking.

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Online Dating with a Budget

ONLINE DATING BUDGET

With the rise in popularity from online dating, dating costs can quickly surge become the equivalent of a car payment. The online date prospects come in waves and as such, can empty a suitor’s wallet faster than he can replenish it. We know what you are thinking: Well, the guy doesn’t have to pay. We could argue all day on whether or not the guy should pay for the date, but from a guy’s perspective, that next date could be “the one”. The last thing he wants is her running back to her friends to say with a frown, “He didn’t pay. . .”

If you can’t have the woman pay for the date and you aren’t a wealthy bachelor; where does that leave us? The only answer to this question is to find a place which isn’t the McDonald’s dollar menu and is a low-cost memorable experience. That is why we have prepared a list of places for your dates. We promise they won’t break your bank.

Coffee and a Stroll

Getting coffee together is a great experience to get to know each other. You both get that extra caffeine spike which will keep the conversation flowing for hours. That is if the chemistry is right. The cost of two coffees is hardly enough to break the bank. The other side of the coin is that if the date is a nightmare; you can always eject from the short-lived situation.

Picnic on a Sunny Day

A picnic is a classic date idea and also very romantic. The idea of consuming tasty fruit while discussing childhood memories on a soft blanket is golden. It is one date that will surely have her running back to her friends to boast. The best part is that you don’t need to stuff yourself like a Thanksgiving turkey. Sandwiches and some healthy snacks go a long way for a relaxing picnic. They are also very inexpensive.

Take Fido Out for a Walk

If you are both dog lovers, taking your dogs out for a walk together is a free and pleasant experience. But what do we talk about? The ice-breaker is a given, talk about your dogs. We ensure that the awkwardness will fade like a summer’s breeze.

Billiards

Most bars have billiard tables in them. Choosing to play against your date in a competitive game can have remarkable ice breaking effects. Just imagine the amount of playful banter to emerge out of that dating experience. Soon you two will be trash-talking each other like you are best friends. The billiard date is an affordable idea. That is unless you both are drinking like fish. Stick with one drink and the game of pool and this date won’t bleed your bank dry.

Watch Airplanes Take Off and Land at the Airport

This might be more of a second date idea, but it’s a creative date idea that must be included. Sitting on the hood of your car next to each other as the planes roar overhead can be a stunning experience together. It might just take you back to your childhood days. You guys can bond over childhood stories and talk about the meaning of life. It is a great relaxed date idea that won’t cost you anything but your time.

 

James Arnold
James is a freelance writer and founder of Wingman-academy.com. He is passionate about helping others succeed with dating and relationships. In his free time, you will find him running with his Greyhound, traveling, or spending time with loved ones.

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How to ruin a perfectly good relationship in 3 easy steps

RUIN A GOOD RELATIONSHIP

It’s finally happened for you! After countless “swipe rights” and endless coffee dates you’ve finally found “your person”. The person you believe to be the missing lid to your pot. Your masterpiece! You’ve been single and independent for so long that you’ve almost forgotten what it feels like to be in a real romantic relationship. Please do yourself a favor and don’t ruin it! If you don’t want to keep this new flame going here are three easy steps on how to ruin it.

Step one

Involve every single person you know in your relationship. Sure go ahead and tell your Mother, your best friend who you rarely speak to (but gave the title to years ago), your co-workers, and finally your caring yet oh-so nosy neighbor. Involve everyone in your fabulous date details, your relationship disagreements, and let’s not forget your amazing energizer bunny sex life. Stop right there! By giving outsiders a front row seat into your relationship you’re setting yourself up for what would be known as a disaster. Not every detail should be discussed. Your private matters and battles you should be fought together to strengthen your bond. Plus not everyone will be thrilled about your new relationship and their poisonous advice could ruin your happiness.

Step two

Don’t be considerate! Your world is and will always be the focus. Your time, your goals, and whatever else it is you feel that’s more important than sharing in your partner’s life as well. Don’t think about their time, schedule, or life! In your new relationship you’re the only one that matters. Try going this route and you’ll find yourself exactly where you started. Back on a dating app!

Step three

Act way too cool! Yap you’ve got it! Keep your Facebook status to single, don’t post any of their pictures, and act like you’re still dating multiple people. It’s ok if you’re not because you still need to act cool, so you don’t appear like you’re actually falling for this person. Don’t answer their text messages right away even if your phone is glued to your hand as always. Please don’t answer their call either! Acting way too cool, like this person actually doesn’t matter to you will eventually have them thinking they don’t! Soon it will be goodbye you! Guess what? You can be cool all by yourself again!

Your assignment will be to do the complete opposite to keep your new relationship alive. Now that you know how to ruin a perfectly good relationship in three easy steps please avoid these mishaps! Try keeping your relationship to yourself for a change, be considerate, and don’t act too cool! You deserve an amazing relationship!

Tia Nicole
Sex toy educator/intimacy aficionado with Passion Parties! Helping people put SPICE back into their bedrooms!

Website – allthingscuteetc.com. Twitter – @AllThngsCuteEtc. Facebook – IamTiaNicole

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Ohlala touted as the Uber for Escorting Industry

OHLALA

The App That’s Changing the Dating Game

It seems like there’s almost too many dating apps out there at the moment. Ohlala is one you definitely won’t have seen before though.

The dating game has changed immensely in recent years, and more often than not, we’re looking for partners online. The escort industry is no different, and it’s recognised these changes in our dating habits. There are now many websites and even a search engine which you can use to find an escort near you. The latest leap forward though, is an app. From now on, you can hire an escort as simply and as quickly as you would hailing a cab on Uber. So let’s find out a little more.

About the app

The app in question is called Ohlala, and it’s the brainchild of Pia Poppenreiter. Her idea was that people could use an app to arrange instant, paid dates. She doesn’t think of herself as someone who’s offering the services of escorts. Instead, she’s a provider of dates that involve the exchanging of money. She’s relaxed about what happens during the dates, saying that that’s a private matter between the two people involved. All that she provides is a safe, easy way for people to connect and then arrange a price and location.

How to use it

When you use the app, you can see the influence of user-friendly, simple to use apps like Uber. So how does it work? Well, the male users will put in a request for a date. This request includes information such as their location, availability and the price they are willing to pay for the date. It’s then up to any available women in the area to take him up on his offer. If no one does that, then the request will disappear after 21 minutes. This puts the mind of male users at ease, as there will be no traces of their request left for anyone else to see. For the women, the app is great as it puts the decision firmly in their hands. So it’s a win-win situation for everyone! It’s a service firmly aimed at adults though, with users having to be 21 or over in order to use the app.

Giving guys a boost

This app could really work wonders for those who are new to the dating scene. Meeting someone via an app like Tinder can be really nerve-racking if you’re not very experienced or outgoing. Ohlala will allow those people to gain confidence – both with the process of using a dating app and the actual dates themselves. Of course, you don’t need to be a dating newbie to use it either. The prospect of spending an evening with a beautiful woman is a tantalizing one to any man.

A welcome development

What’s clear is that apps like this are making hiring an escort really easy, and blurring the lines between that and casual dating. Services like this mean that seeing an escort is rapidly becoming a normal part of the dating experience, and anyone with access to a smart phone can join in on the fun. Dating may be totally different to how it was a decade ago, but apps like this show us that it’s definitely a lot more fun!

 

Jonathan Bird
Jonathan is our Managing Director. He started Singles Warehouse in 2009 and has since watched it explode into one of the biggest and best dating resources on the internet. Proud of the #SWEXPERTS and everything they achieve, he loves to see many different messages delivered on Singles Warehouse because ‘it will resonate with someone’. A huge believer in IDIC – infinite diversity in infinite combinations.

Outside of the office Jonathan loves supporting start up companies, offering advice on growing dating businesses and playing on his xBox!

Visit his Website

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10 Most Romantic Spots in Madrid

ROMANTIC MADRID SPOTS

Forget Paris, This is The New City of Love

The Spanish capital city is the perfect location for a weekend of eating, sightseeing and some serious romance.

Madrid is one of the most popular tourist destinations in the world, and it’s the ideal place for a little romance. After all, it’s a city full of stunning architecture, great restaurants and world class hotels – the perfect backdrop to any romantic getaway. So if you’re planning to take a trip to the Spanish capital, where should you head to if you’re trying to woo that special someone? Our definitive guide covers ten of the city’s most romantic locations to help you out.

Templo de Debod

If you’re trying to impress the lady in your life, then visit the Templo de Debod. This Egyptian temple is set in some stunning grounds. Head there at sunset, where the sun reflects off of the water and the whole place has a really magical aura.

Parque El Capricho

Parque El Capricho is the perfect spot for a romantic stroll. The park is filled with grottos, fountains, shrines and little spots where you can just sit together and forget the whole world. If you want some escapism, this is the place to go.

Botín

It’s the oldest restaurant in the world – and Botín really is an experience in itself. Book ahead to get a table in the incredible vaulted cellar, where you can really soak up that famous atmosphere. The food is great too – try the suckling pig!

Hotel Ritz

Want to spend the night in incredible luxury? Then book a room at the Hotel Ritz. Here you’ll find chandeliers and silk bed canopies along with incredible food and spa facilities. If you’re feeling flush, this is the hotel for you.

Teatro Real

If you’re a fan of music, take your date to the Teatro Real, Madrid’s beautiful opera house. Here you can watch some incredible opera performances, as well as classical recitals and ballets. There’s nothing more romantic than some beautiful music, after all.

Hotel Orfila

A lovely family run hotel, Hotel Orfila makes up for what it lacks in size with plenty of character. The rooms are opulently decorated, and the beautiful courtyard garden is the perfect place to sit together in the sunshine sipping on a glass of wine.

Al Trapo

Al Trapo serves up food by one of the country’s most talented chefs, Paco Morales. The food here is reasonably priced, and the location is fantastic (perfect for couples on a budget!) The star dish is the braised oxtail stew with sea snails and polenta gnocchi.

Filmoteca Espanola

A trip to the cinema is surely the most popular kind of date. Filmoteca Espanola is far from your standard multiplex though. A beautifully restored Art Nouveau building, it’s a beautiful place to watch a romantic movie together.

Ramon Freixa Madrid

Ramon Freixa Madrid has two Michelin Stars, so it’s one for the foodies. The menu is always changing, but you can always rely on top-class service alongside the incredible cooking. Make sure you dress up – eating here truly is a special occasion.

Principal Madrid

If its great views you’re after, then stay at The Principal Madrid. With a roof terrace that allows you to look out over the rooftops of the city from comfy chairs, it’s certainly in a great location. It’s a sleek, stylish place to stay – and will definitely wow the lady in your life.

Finding the right company

As you can see, Madrid is the perfect place for a loved-up getaway. If you’re single but still want to see the romantic side of the city, why not hire an escort in Madrid? Some beautiful company could make your romantic weekend much more fun – and you can arrange seeing her around any other commitments. It’s the best of both worlds. So why not discover what makes Madrid one of the most romantic destinations in the world? You certainly won’t regret it.

 

Jonathan Bird
Jonathan is our Managing Director. He started Singles Warehouse in 2009 and has since watched it explode into one of the biggest and best dating resources on the internet. Proud of the #SWEXPERTS and everything they achieve, he loves to see many different messages delivered on Singles Warehouse because ‘it will resonate with someone’. A huge believer in IDIC – infinite diversity in infinite combinations.

Outside of the office Jonathan loves supporting start up companies, offering advice on growing dating businesses and playing on his xBox!

Visit his Website

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Selfish Lovers

SELFISH LOVERS

Here is something that is not only important but consequential because their reaction is unknown territory. Now what I’m about to say is directed to all you selfish lovers out there, and that’s to knock it off! Selfish lovers are painfully ignorant to others not just sexually but in life over all. What I have noticed are that those who are selfish know they are, and don’t care. However, if you have a selfish lover on your hands tell them because it is possible that they are unaware. Once that confirmation is brought to fruition make sure you work towards your lover’s needs as much as your own. Sex is not a toy for you to use just to get your rocks off. This selfishness is concerning because this shows a behavioral pattern that is purely one sided. With no care or concern for others makes it difficult to further and construct a healthy relationship. Selfish lovers have no connection to the relationship but instead their own physical needs. This makes it difficult for them to not just connect with you, but to anticipate your needs. If you are involved in a relationship with a selfish lover it’s best to talk to them and nip that in the butt! They don’t know they are being selfish, because they can’t see past themselves. It’s a paradoxical idea, but it’s real difficult for them to see what they’re doing and how it’s affecting you. No matter if your relationship is solely based on the physical or have a strong foundation this is not an easy topic to speak about. This is mainly because it can feel like a letdown or negatively causing the individual to become put off or even defensive.

On the other hand, if you know that you’re a selfish lover you are doing more harm than good for your relationship. If you can even say that’s what you have… You should never play with a person’s feelings because you never know how they may react. Making it difficult for them to recover and move on to a healthier more stable relationship all because of your selfishness. Before you go to bed with your significant other ask “is there anything you like that I may not be doing”? Then shut up and listen.

Be good and treat each other right!

Tracy Limon
I am currently working towards my MS in Family and Marriage Therapy emphasizing my studies in human sexuality. I help identify problematic areas that men and women face individually or in relationships. I’ve recently started blogging to utilize my education and help others identify those differences, mistakes, and bad habits that they have yet to conquer. It is my belief that we need to understand our own expectations before we can place expectations onto others.

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Dating After 40…UGH.

DATING AFTER 40

I began dating again at age 44, more than 2 years after I decided to end my 15 year long marriage. I didn’t actually CHOOSE to start dating again…(more on that later). I really had NO interest in men. At all. I used to tell people “I just got rid of one. WHY ON EARTH would I go looking for another one???” (Yeah, the marriage wasn’t all that fun there the last uh…7-8 years!) Anyhoo…

Let me tell you something. Dating in your 40’s is a PITA. That’s “Pain In The Ass” for those of you who don’t text (or have a love of acronyms). Having not been in the dating world since the 90’s creates one ginormous learning curve for starters. Honestly I don’t even remember HOW we met people to date when I got out of college.

It started in January with a man 12 years younger than me asking “What are you doing later?” My mind began to play a list of what I might actually be doing later that day (laundry, cooking dinner for my kids, yoga, maybe writing…) before I realized that he was asking for a date. Gah! I politely declined his advance and thought he was cute for putting himself out there like that.

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What happened over the next 48 hours completely blindsided me! ALL MY PAST RELATIONSHIP STUFF CAME UP… doubts, fears, insecurities, my “failures”. Then the questions… What do I really want anyway? Do I WANT to start dating again? Then I landed on “Why the hell not?” I didn’t see any of it coming!

To speed things up I’ll tell you that I decided to spend time with that man for almost two months. One day when something juuust didn’t feel right to me, I called it off. Then I found out he had a girlfriend all that time. Then I found out his girlfriend was really his WIFE. So that was my first dating experience after divorce.

As reeling as it was, the experience catapulted me into a space I’d never been in before. I was reminded how a good kiss feels. I remembered that I enjoyed the company of a man. It was exciting to learn about someone new. And I wanted MORE.

So began what I affectionately refer to as The Year of Dating 2015. I met a lot of men online, even though at first I was completely opposed to it. I had some varied results, as is to be expected I suppose. Interestingly, the results changed for me over the course of the year, in 3 “phases”.

During phase one I was entirely out of control. Well to a degree. All I wanted was to feel that “high”. You know, the baiting, the hook, that first touch, kiss….etc. etc. It was like a game. It was thrilling! It made me feel sexy again. Wanted. Until it didn’t. I got my heart hurt. A couple of times. So I stepped back, assessed my behavior and went back in for phase two. It was better. I felt like an advanced player. I knew a little more about what to do and what not to do. I created rules for myself. After a couple of months, I was crying again, cursing the whole process.

It took me a few weeks, after swearing I wasn’t going “out there” again, to enter phase three. This time I totally changed up my approach. I looked at it more like an experiment. I chose not to care as much. I decided to stand in my own power more. The craziest thing happened! The men that started to message me and seek me out were altogether different than the ones before that. The conversations were more intelligent, more substantial, and the “creepy” guys virtually disappeared. What??? What WAS this magic? Phase 3 turned out to be much more fun and I felt so much better about myself while dating during this time.

Well, at the end of the Year of Dating 2015 I did quite a bit of reflecting. What came to me in a very clear way was that in that last “phase” I showed up completely differently than I had before. My energy was not that of a woman needing a man. It was confident, relaxed and in fact more authentic. I chose to respect myself more than the man on the other side of the chat box. If something, anything, felt “off”, either I didn’t respond or I deleted/blocked the person.

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What I learned is this: YOU choose how to show up online for potential dates. If you want to sleep around and not expect much from your matches, then post sexy extra cleavage pics and flirt a lot. Don’t be shy. You’ll get exactly what you want. (No judgment here by the way. I ran that course.) But if you are looking for a life partner or someone to really value you as you and not just a play thing, then you MUST communicate that through your words, pictures and energy online. It is ALL about what you put “out there”. It will come back to you like a big ass, in your face mirror. And be honest about what you want. I’ve heard from a lot of men that women online say things like “No hookups” but then they post revealing pics and send suggestive messages to them. That isn’t honest. It’s manipulative. Don’t do it.

Online dating is what you make of it. Decide what you want. Communicate that in a genuine way. Create some guidelines for what you are willing to allow in a conversation, a date, and beyond. Honor your decisions and guidelines. (You can change your rules whenever you want to of course.) Remember to stand in your power. Then have fun!

Becky Heart
Becky Heart is a Certified Life and Yoga Coach. She was personally trained by Martha Beck and studied Yoga Coaching through Yoga Church, the first Yoga Alliance Accredited Yoga Coach teacher training. Becky holds a BA in Psychology from CSU Fresno and is a member of American Mensa.

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6 keys to keeping your marriage alive

Keeping your marriage alive

Being married and especially for many years is not so easy thing because passion and fire it’s difficult to stay alive… Even though when you commit to one another that’s usually the intention, after a few years or even months, the “fire” sometimes dwindles and may even go out completely. You have to make many concessions and you have to be quite patient…

Here we look at just some of the secrets and relationship tips on how to keep the love and passion in a relationship alive long after the fire, for many, would have gone out:

1. Stoke the fire with some thoughtful gifts.

Don’t let the exchanging of gifts just become a birthday and Christmas routine. When you’re out shopping, keep one eye out for something he’d like and buy it on the spur of the moment. It doesn’t need to be something expensive; it really is the thought that counts.

2. Have some fun in the bedroom.

Relationship tips would be incomplete without intimacy talk. Don’t let your intimate moments get boring. Buy a book or google for some ideas. Some of the positions will give you a good laugh, at least, if nothing else!

3. Go on a date.

Don’t get stuck in the same old routine and go out on a date together now and then. Book a romantic meal for two and finish the night with some champagne in front of the fire at home. You’re never too old for a bit of old fashioned romance.

4. Focus on the things that make him great.

Things for which you first fell in love with him, so that the flavor of his socks and flatulence won’t seem so bad!

5. Make time to talk.

We all know that good communication is the key to a healthy and happy relationship. Put aside some time for talking and concentrate on what you’re talking about. It’s not just about half listening to what he has to say, while you do the chores; it’s about sitting down together, looking each other in the eyes and really discussing things.

6. Just be there for one another.

Let your partner know that, whatever happens, you’ll be there for him. Ask what you can do to make his life better today and work together to make both of your lives just that tiny little bit better each and every day.

Harriet Brookes
Harriet is a blogger from Cyprus but currently lives in Rome, Italy. She has professional experience as a blogger at dating news , a columnist in magazines and sites in Italy and Greece. Harriet has a degree in journalism and a degree in cultural management units. Harriet’s hobbies include tennis, travelling and cooking.

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