I know you look at happy couples right now and want to strangle them. You’re not really that girl though. You’re just pissed at the moment. Someone broke your heart and you want to crawl in bed with Netflix, vodka and carryout for the next 90 days, and cry about it.
But you’re better than that. You are going to get your shit together like a big girl and come back stronger than ever.
1. Stop listening to your girlfriends.
They will only tell you how great you are and how “he” was an asshole—all men are assholes. You need the truth. You need someone to help you accept some fault here. Regardless of what happened, you need to own up to something. I guarantee it.
2. Think before you go on a sex spree.
Booty calls and revenge sex is not the answer. Rediscover a passion or find a new hobby instead. Vent that frustration into something productive and that doesn’t have the potential to lead to unwanted pregnancy or STDs. Okay, just one random, hot stranger, with a condom. Then get back to working on you.
3. Stop telling people how you got screwed over.
Pity parties are not fun to watch and wasting even more time on an ex is like trying to reuse a tampon. It’s messy and it is never gonna work out.
4. Don’t play the insult game with him.
You don’t call, text, Facebook a single word of negativity, or respond to him. A woman with her shit together doesn’t air her business in public or have the need to sling insults. Self-respect and shutting your mouth will save your sanity. In fact, delete him altogether from your social media accounts, and for now, block him on your phone.
5. Get some perspective
Take an outside look at the relationship and the breakup itself. Accept some fault, but stop rehashing what went wrong or what you could’ve done to be better. It’s over. It didn’t work. Now you need to date yourself for a couple of months and invest in that relationship. Figure out who you are without a damn man.
[Tweet “Trust that you will love again and this will be but a blip #PostBreakUp”]
6. Get off social media.
And for the love of all that’s holy, stop complaining about men and/or that you are now single—to 400 of your closest and not so closest friends. It makes you look unstable. And so do all of the love quotes, by the way.
7. Do something just for you.
Get out in the world in the fresh air and light of day. Learn to appreciate life’s little miracles at a park or in the woods. Take a short trip alone. Have a spa day. Buy some new bedding. Whatever will make you feel pampered, renewed and fulfilled.
8. Stay away from bitter or man-hating women.
They will just fuel the fire on your broken heart and you don’t need that kind of negativity right now. Find positive, up-beat people that will encourage you to get past this with dignity.
9. Realize that you might have to change a little.
If you find yourself saying, “I am not going change who I am just to get or keep a man”, you just might have to soften up a bit and work on yourself. There’s always room for improvement and you’re not entitled to be “gotten” by a man just as you are. It’s okay to take the bitch wall down and be open to your feminine nature.
10. Trust that the perfect person for you is out there.
Trust that you will love again and this will be but a blip. He did not break you. This is not a bad life; it’s just an unfortunate turn of events.
11. Now write yourself and your ex each a letter.
Release all of the hurt and acknowledge all of the great stuff about the relationship, too. Forgive him and forgive you, and then burn them to pieces. Let yourself off the hook and move on as a stronger woman.
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