As a Love Coach and a modern woman, I know all too well about dating in this modern world. I understand how it can be confusing and frustrating at times. Even with all this technology to connect us, we can end up feeling well…disconnected. When in dating all you want is direct, honest and clear answers from men (that are not just about wanting to have sex with you)So if you are an awesome woman that attracts men that don’t ask her out on dates and don’t know why, here is some love wisdom that will relieve you of the pointless overanalyzing of these men’s choices. And finally support you to stop allowing them to take up valuable real estate in your head and heart.
1. He’s Not Interested
I know, OUCH! But it’s not what you think. Understand a man’s interest in you has nothing to do with his attraction to you. Men can be physically attracted to you, but once they feel you’re not “down” for what he wants or that you require more of him than he is willing to invest then he won’t pursue anything further than a good conversation.
Men are not wrong for being this way. Men know what they want, so you get to know too. Don’t waste your energy to convince a man otherwise, no matter how great of a man he is (on the surface or on paper). My question to you is, what do you want? And would you want someone trying to convince you to disregard on your own love values and standards?
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2. He’s Not Available
There are many men that are not forthcoming with their current relationship status. You often must to pry to get the relationship status out of this guy. When a man is not available and he chooses not to ask you out, he is showing loyalty, he has boundaries and consideration, so thank your lucky stars that he has not asked you out and wasted your time.
When a man is already in a committed relationship, married or legally separated (yes, separated is not single, because he is only single if he was officially divorced). This is simple to accept. Yet, you choose to stay stuck on this man with the hopes of romance. Instead, make use of the connect you have with this man by asking him to set you up with his single male friends.
Isn’t that what you want your romantic partner to do in the same situation? Or have you chosen this man to be a shoulder to cry on causing more drama in both your romantic lives? Maybe you’re thinking “these are the only type of good men I know”. Well, then you’re not accessing whom they know to connect you to the love you want. As I mentioned before, ask for what you want by requesting that he introduce you to his single male friends. If he doesn’t, get your lovely self out of there.
Please understand that an unavailable man cannot give you what you desire and deserve, so I move on to the next single one. And know that all the time you spend thinking and doing anything of the contrary, you are undermining your own value. If he’s not single don’t stick around to mingle.
3. He’s Not Ready
Ok, this can be the most frustrating one, because it all seems good, hell, great in fact. This man is interested in you, attracted to you and he’s available, but for some reason he is not stepping up. He learned what you’re about so far and he thinks it’s awesome. Yet, he doesn’t make a move. Well, that’s because he’s not ready.
He is focused on his career, his children, processing the end of his marriage or his last relationship, his fear of intimacy (um yeah, he will never tell you this one), his latest chosen life challenge. This list goes on and on, but none of that matters.
Here is the reality; he is choosing to be focused on those things, because that is where he is and this is his process. If he was ready to connect with you, then he would be proactive by asking you out and consistently spend time with you to get to know each other better. It’s not rocket science, it just needs to be his desired choice. After all, men are all about taking action for what they want.
Lisa Velazquez is a Love Coach and the creator of Lisa Talks Love. Whether you want to learn how to date wise, get over an ex and attract your Mr. Right, Lisa teaches women entrepreneurs and professionals to break through hidden barriers in love and dating to finally atract the romantic relationship they desire.
Done With Being in A Romantic Rut? Ready To Take Your Love Life To The Next Level? Join Lisa for her FREE Teleseminar: 10 Blindspots That Keep Women From The Love Life They Want on Tuesday, October 20th from 9pm-10:00pm EST https://10loveblindspots.eventbrite.com