The first thing a woman notices in you is how you look. She will sum you up in about 3 to 4 seconds and know whether she is interested in you or not. So, of course, you want to look your best in order to spark that attraction.
Right after her initial visual evaluation of you, the next thing she will notice will be your voice. Most men don’t think anything about how they actually sound to the world, but you have a great addition to your Dating Bat Utility Belt and it’s located right behind your Adam’s Apple.
Your voice can make you more attractive.
It can also hamper your efforts. I have made a living with my voice for many years now in radio, TV, and the animation world. My voice is a tool that I have learned to fine tune. I have taught many men how to improve their dating success by understanding just how their voices can affect how they are being heard by others, mainly women.
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Studies have shown that women with higher voices are more attractive to men as that signals higher estrogen and women are attracted to men with deeper voices as that signals higher testosterone. Pretty standard stuff. That’s why Barry White is officially one badass mofo.
Further studies have shown that people are drawn to those who sound like themselves, usually from the same region or community. Obviously this is not a rule, but every bit of knowledge can help you in your dating quest and in some cases can turn tides in your favor.
Here are 5 ways to use your voice to make you more attractive.
Make it deeper.
My natural voice is settled somewhere near the the base of my neck with a hint of nasal twinge. I know that if I open my throat up a bit so that there is more room for sound to bounce around and anchor it in my chest, I can deepen it. Play with your voice a little, move it around in your throat and chest area. Imagine pulling it away from your nasal area. After some time you will find a smoother deeper voice that you can make your own. Using a voice recorder can really help out here. And finding an actor with a deeper voice you think you can imitate can guide you to where you want to be.
Slow it down.
A frantic higher voice does not instill confidence in those listening to it. And most women do not find that appealing. Sounding calm, cool, and collected is definitely attractive. By slowing your speech you seem more in control. And by taking your time to say exactly what you mean, there is less chance of you saying something stupid and looking like an asshat. I know this from experience.
In this world of texting and email, your voice is losing its persuasive power. Why hamstring yourself by not using one of your strongest attracting assets. By using your voice, you can be subtle, humorous, cute, sexy, and all sorts of other things just by a clever turn of phrase and well executed delivery. You can have subtext, be persuasive; things you cannot do with the printed word. A sexy voice message goes much farther than a cutesy text. And since most other guys these days do everything by text and email, you will stand above the rest of the pack and be the better MAN.
Clean up your act.
Sometimes it’s not what you say, it’s how you say it. If you are, using “like,” “uh,” “ya know,” and other little stuttering and/or stammering speed bumps you can make yourself look far less intelligent than you really are. And for the love of all things holy knock off all the cursing. Dropping F bombs may be the norm these days, but it still makes you sound foolish and immature, especially in public. Watch what you say and how you say it.
Shut yer pie hole.
One of the greatest skills in dating is knowing when NOT to use your voice. If you are using yours she is not getting the chance to use hers. Spend twice as much time listening than talking. Don’t feel you have to fill every silent moment, that can come off as needy and nervous. Women want to be heard. So you be the MAN that listens. Give them the chance and you will be greatly rewarded I promise you.
Take the time to improve yourself every day in some way, and don’t neglect one of your greatest tools, your voice. Record yourself and listen to how you actually sound. It more than likely does not sound like you think it does. Have fun and play around with your speech patterns, tone, pace, levels, etc. and you may find that you can be even more attractive every time you open your mouth.