The SW Experts | Confessions of a Serial Dater
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Confessions of a Serial Dater

serial dater

Before my divorce, I could never have imagined that I would ever be in the dating pool again. Post-divorce, I found myself loving every second of my new found freedom and this single dating lifestyle. As I gained more confidence on this new journey, I went from a single girl casually dating a guy here and there, to a full-fledged serial dater.

Confessions of a Serial Dater

How It All Began

The transformation happened pretty quickly, I must admit. I started out with one or two first dates lined up for a weekend, but I quickly progressed to 5 or 6 dates in one weekend. At the height of my serial dater lifestyle I had a spreadsheet with 14+ guys’ names, likes and dislikes, dates we went on and what I wore on those dates. By the time my dating pool grew this high I was booking 7 or 8 dates per weekend! I would book a dinner date for Friday night, 3 dates for Saturday (breakfast lunch and dinner) and then the same for Sunday.

Why Serial Dating?

serial daterWhat most people hate about dating, I love. I love the anticipation of hanging out with someone new. I love the first date awkwardness and working through it. I love figuring out what to wear, thinking of what to say, etc.  The newness of it all is exciting to me and once the excitement wears off, so too does my attention span more often than not. Most of all I love kissing a bunch of frogs (or listening to them drudge on and on about their company’s stock value) because it has helped me figure out exactly what I want and don’t want in a life partner.

Love Advice from a Serial Dater

Whether dating multiple people at once is totally your style or something you’re just not comfortable with, I strongly suggest everyone give it a try at least once in their dating lives. I married young and had no idea what I really wanted in a life partner. Once I got divorced, I still had no real idea what I wanted or needed. Serial dating is about companionship, it’s about finding out what works for you and what doesn’t, it’s about playing the field and having fun dating.

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Being a serial dater has opened my eyes to so many different types of people whom I wouldn’t ordinarily have given a second glance. But I’ve also learned more about myself than if I jumped from relationship to relationship.

While the life of a serial dater isn’t for everyone, and not everyone has the ability or desire to date 14+ people at the same time, playing the field with two or three different people can be fun too.

Something to keep in mind—not everyone you date has the potential to be “the one” and not every date you go on has the potential to turn into a relationship. If you are realistic about dating and you understand that it’s meant to be enjoyable, then why not enjoy it with a couple different people?

The last bit of advice I have is to try being a serial dater for 30 days. If, at the end of 30 days, you decide you really didn’t learn anything about yourself or you really didn’t enjoy it, then stop. At least you will have tried something new to spice up your dating routine and you met some interesting new people. Win-win!