When is getting a number from her worthless? When she hesitates to give it to you.
You’ll frequently hear me say that WOMEN HELP YOU WHEN THEY LIKE YOU and you know the feeling in your gut when you REALLY LIKE her? Yeah, if she doesn’t have that too then forget about her.
So, when can this come into play?
Let’s say you meet her at a wedding and you chat for a half hour or so – you ask her for her number, she hesitates and says something like “um, why don’t you give me your number” or “can I have your business card” or “why do you want it?”. Now you’re sorely disappointed because you know that if you can’t at least get her number then she’s not interested – but then she surprises you – after this brief hesitation she relents and ends up giving you the number. Happy days are here again – but not really.
[Tweet “If a woman hesitates when you ask for her number she probably isn’t interested #datingadvice”]Let’s flip it around from your side so we can truly illustrate why a number not given right away is not a number at all. You’re at the wedding reception and you see a woman across the room you’re truly into – man you feel shaky just looking at her and then all of a sudden you see your good friend talking to her so you go over and get introduced. She starts talking to you and giving you all sorts of buying signals, but you’re still kind of in disbelief mode – I mean here’s a girl you noticed across the room as one of the prettiest ladies at the party and now you’re not only talking to her but she seems into you.
What happens next truly blows your mind. As you’re chatting with her with a mixture of extreme anxiety and joy you’re thinking “do I ask her out, does she have a guy, what’s her story, how can I keep this going?” all of a sudden she says “would you like my number – it’d be great to see you again.” My gosh – she’s asking you out.
Now, is your reaction after all this to say, “um, why don’t you give me your number,” or “can I have your business card” or “why do you want it?” – I DON’T THINK SO. I think what happens is you stammer out your number as fast as you can and then you try to get her number too. You act right away because you don’t want to have any chance of letting this opportunity slip through your fingers.
So, if she can’t feel that way about you then it isn’t worth it. Why would you want to waste your time and chase her around if she’s just going to forget about you 10 minutes after the bride and groom roll onto their honeymoon.
You are definitely setting yourself up for a lot of frustration and disappointment in this scenario because you’re going to go through all the steps to get her out on the date and then heaven forbid if she actually goes on the date with you. You can then multiply your frustration exponentially once you call, plan the evening, pick her up and pay for an evening where she’s half bored and looking around after her belly is full of surf and turf.
Look, there are a lot of great women out there, but there’s an equal number of women that aren’t so great and don’t have a problem with just getting out of the house for an evening with a guy that’s “okay” in their minds. You were nice enough and you probably have a Visa Card with some room on it so she thinks “what the hell, maybe I’ll like him and if not at least I’m out of the house and maybe I’ll run into someone I like.”
If you don’t think there aren’t some women out there that think like that then you’re sorely mistaken – so learn to read the signals up front and delete the numbers that aren’t really numbers!
Remember guys, WOMEN HELP YOU WHEN THEY LIKE YOU
For more on this subject listen to my FREE dating women radio show excerpt that expands on what I written in this article.