Coffees. Dinners out. Cinema tickets. Hotels. Flights. Weekends away. Clothes. Cars. Watches. All the standard things paid out in a relationship. But in the last few year’s women and increasingly paying out far more and sometime more than the man in the relationship.
Is getting into debt a step to far to prove equality?
In my past few relationships I have dated men who have been in relationships where the woman has used and abused the chivalry card and left my future boyfriends broken hearted and broke. But does this then mean that I need to prove my love and commitment by buying everything? And I mean everything!
I like to think I am a modern woman. I have a career. I have career goals. I have been paying for myself since the age on 18. I like to go Dutch on dates to make it fair, not because I am making a statement but because I want too. But in recent years I have been the one that is filling the ‘mans’ role and dishing out the dosh. And to make matters worse, I happily pay out time and time again.
Why do I, as a woman fill I need to make up for other women who have been take take take, and to prove my independence and my bank balance.
Has striving for equality done a 180 on women?
Or are there two different types of women in the world?
This last year I was dating a man who’s ex quite literally cleared out his house after they broke up. She hadn’t worked for the last year and a half of their relationship. He lives in America so regular travel costs for a weekend booty call were on the high end of my budget. Anyone’s budget. But time after time I paid out. Due to scheduling it was easier for me to fly to him, but when booking the flights and hinting at the price no mention of a 50/50 split or ‘I’ll get this one’, was motioned.
Am I an idiot for letting this go on for over a year? Yes. Absolutely. Idiot is in fact tattooed across my forehead right next to twat and dickhead.
Money took its toll on my purse. When bringing up this issue waves of guilt ran through me. Why was I feeling guilty asking for help to afford to see my boyfriend but not be tarred with the brush as his ex? I wasn’t asking to be a kept woman with 90% of my body made from plastic and driving a Porsche. I just wanted to half the grand flight cost.
After googling – money issues in relationships – I was overwhelmed with the amount of articles from Lads Mag’s, about if the man pays on the first date he’ll be on a slippery slop to paying for everything. This really doesn’t help me in anyway, shape or form. It the ex’s haven’t ruined them, then the Lads Mag’s sure will.
[Tweet “Has Striving For Equality Done A 180 On Women? #Dating #Equality @_TSGirl”]
I am screwed. Official screwed, and I’ll end up single, broke or a complete bitch.
It seems I need to either use and abuse in a relationship, or be taken for a ride.
After years of fighting for equality in the work place, in government and in the world, surely we need to fight for equality in dating. Dating takes two to tango, and this should be established from the early stages. We aren’t in the dark ages where women aren’t working (expect in the house) so therefore have no money to pay for dates. The female employment rate is at an all time high with 67.4% of women working (the male employment rate is 77.8%). Unfortunately the gender pay gap does still needs a little work. Watch this space!
But with these new statistics must we sit on the fence and let the man pay for everything or be punished for the ways of the past?