The SW Experts | Framing Our Dating Life as a Self Discovery Journey
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Framing Our Dating Life as a Self Discovery Journey

Framing Our Dating Life as a Self Discovery Journey


There are 2 main stages in a human being’s love life journey. Lack of clarity around this one fact is the heart of most relationship suffering.

Stage 1- Dating/Mating/Relating as Our Least Mature Selves

Our personal growth happens in this stage, hopefully. We do our self discovery work in this stage of life, if we are sufficiently awake to work with it this way. If not, we stagnate here.

Growth relating happens when we tangle with our attraction partners and sparks fly. We need to do this in order to get to know ourselves, to feel into what we need to work on and discover about what we want out of life.

This is a stage to go through…not to stay in forever, yet this is the stage that most people are in when they get married. This one fact is the heart of most martial/long term relationship suffering.

Stage 2- Dating/Mating/Relating as Our More Mature Selves

Adult, core value and personal integrity based relationships are about aligning purposes. When we know ourselves well and have taken action on our life purpose we can then and only then make wise choices about who we hang out with, create alliances with and who we partner with in a committed sexual relationship.

The goal in this stage is be super potent and constructive in the world together, more so than if you were apart. How many couples do you see that are doing their relationship with both firmly planet in this stage?

You can see that the big question becomes, how do you use your dating life to get through the Less-Mature-Self-Stage and come out the other side ready to rock in your Mature-Self relationships?

First I’ll let you in on the super challenging part… our sexual attraction relationships require some stage 1 type stuff to go on over the long term, only done in a new leveled up mature way in order to keep the sexy alive. We have to figure out how to keep some of the personal growth friction going now and then, in order to keep sexual polarity alive. This is the extraordinary challenge of doing mature relationships that are both sexy and also stable and constructive in the world. They are a rare find.

So, the answer is that you use your stage 1 experiences with a frame around them as being solely for self discovery and this will launch you into the capacity to do a long term relationship with confidence and clearing.

[Tweet “Growth relating happens when we tangle with our attraction partners and sparks fly #GrowingOldTogether”]

When we frame stage 1 this way and we are seeking to graduate into stage 2 before we take on huge commitments and the biggest financial decisions of our live it takes all the undue pressure off, allows everyone to enjoy each other and it removes all the feeling of rejection out of your dating/mating/relating life.
Got the concept? Good, now let’s go deeper. Please allow me to help you figure out the HOW part with this free gift

Let me know how you liked the gift and I’ll send you my “Rejection Proof Dating Guide” online course for FREE as well!