Foreign men entering online relationships with Russian brides are being routinely taken advantage of.
In my estimates at least 80% of income of dating sites listing Russian, Ukrainian women seeking contacts internationally comes from a deceitful setup. This income exceeds 100 million US dollars every year, and most of it, I believe, is pure extortion and fraud.
This setup is explained in detail in my latest eBook Stop Wasting Money Dating Russian, Ukrainian women.
My Russian Bride Story
It was 1997 when I was a Russian bride: A pretty young girl who was looking for love beyond borders. I had a graduate degree in Philosophy from a Russian University and was employed as a regional manager of an international marketing agency, with up to 150 people working for me on certain projects.
I was slim, pretty, smart, and totally unable to find a husband in Russia. (Simple demographics: There are 86 men for 100 women.)
Besides, I was 27 years old, the age when all hopes to find matrimonial happiness are considered lost for a single Russian woman. I was desperate and this is why I opted to send my photos to several agencies offering contacts with single foreign men.
At that point in time, people still were sending letters by air mail. I received over 250 letters from men all over the world, talked to 30-40 of them, and got married to a westerner within 18 months from starting my search for love. It was easy.
The Change in The Russian Dating Scene
Unfortunately, those days of clean-cut communication with Russian girls searching relationships are long gone. The dating scene is dominated by players who created a setup fraught with fraud and scams.
Today the majority of sites offering introductions to Russian and Ukrainian women work in “pay per message” (paid chat) model.
In this scheme, you are not paying a membership fee as you do on Match.com, for example, but pay for each message sent or received via email or chat.
The problem is that “paid chat” dating sites promising men “beautiful Russian brides” are paying commissions to local agents for each message.
To maximize their revenues, entrepreneurial local agents started to engage pretty women to pose as “marriage agency models” for a small fee and hire other people to type letters. There are literally hundreds of ads offering such “jobs” listed on Ukrainian recruitment portals as I am writing this article today.
The whole point of PPL dating sites went from relationships to keeping guys hooked while paying for communication.
Russian Brides from Agents
As the popularity of the scheme and the sheer overpowering scale of marketing by PPL sites offering contacts with Slavic women grew, smaller players who didn’t switch to “paid chat” model found it hard to compete and be discovered through searches.
Today if you run a search for “Russian women dating”, you will probably find mostly PPL (pay per letter) dating sites.
Local agents who provide pretty profiles to large PPL sites encountered fierce competition between themselves. There are literally thousands of them today, several dozen in every city. Each delivers profiles and letters for large PPL sites, in exchange for commissions.
- As soon as a man enters a PPL site, he is instantly bombarded by chat requests from “pretty Russian brides” who haven’t even seen his face or know how old he is.
- If he decides to take the bait, he is allowed to read the first message for free.
- To respond, he needs to purchase a bunch of “credits”, several of which are deducted each time he opens a message or sends one.
It can quickly go into hundreds of dollars, with experienced letter-writers keeping men addicted.
The funny thing is, the pretty girl in photos may have no idea about her ardent foreign suitor. It’s all about the money that men pay for communication, and keeping it going for as long as possible.
Scam Checks by Dating Sites
Surely such tricks wouldn’t go unnoticed by the dating sites? They didn’t.
PPL sites developed a “scam check” procedure by phoning the girl in photos and asking about her communication: Who she is talking to, about what, is she being paid for chatting to men.
The local agents responded by entering phone numbers of their “typing slaves” into the profile and matching names on file (a girl named Anastasia could be hired to type for the profile of another Anastasia, according to reports by undercover journalists).
The local agents’ instructions to their “typing slaves”: The answer to the question about being paid for chatting to men, if ever asked, should be always an unequivocal, “No!”
According to reports, the “typing slaves” are required to send 350 letters a day to men who login to the site, trying to get more of them hooked on communication.
- The amount of messages sent by each profile, despite the number of permanent suitors, doesn’t seem to bother the organizers of PPL schemes.
- The fact that communication goes for months with dozens of suitors also doesn’t worry them.
- The fact that girls are unfazed by the need to spend several hours online daily (and supposedly not being paid for that) is also of no concern for PPL sites.
They keep claiming that there is nothing wrong with their setup.
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Why Men Keep Paying
Why the men chatting to their online “brides” don’t just exchange contact details and start talking to women directly, would you ask?
If they do, the “typing slave” will send them an email to the direct address provided saying that it is “more convenient for her” to communicate on the PPL dating site.
The men who hope, despite all odds, that “this is real”, go back and start paying for each message again, thinking they are building relationships.
What You Don’t Know About Russia Will Hurt You
Foreign men are duped into these schemes because they simply don’t know facts about life in Russia, Ukraine, Belarus, etc.
- Everyone has Internet access in Russia, Ukraine.
- Even old grannies have mobile phones.
- Free Wi-Fi is available in cafes, shopping centres, on buses, trains.
- The biggest problem of Russian, Ukrainian parents is to get kids off the Internet — just like for western parents.
- Pretty girls whose profiles you see on PPL sites have accounts in social networks, where they post messages and photos for their friends every day.
- The size of Internet sales grows about 40% in Ukraine and Russia every year. People buy books, clothing online, pay bills, etc. Just like you do!
And the biggest scam of all: The payments for communication are disguised as “translations”.
- In reality, all Russian and Ukrainian women study English at school for 6 years and have to pass an exam at the end.
- Even if their fluency in the language is not 100% perfect, they are able to read and use a translation app or Google translate.
In short, the need to communicate through PPL sites is one huge lie. There is no need for that whatsoever.
It’s purely self-serving: The PPL sites make millions by telling western men that any guy (no matter how old or unattractive) can get a gorgeous Russian, Ukrainian bride, who will be thrilled to join him in his country.
Once a guy is hooked, it’s all about local “typing slaves” perpetrating the dream.
If You Are Dating Someone from Russia
If you are in an online relationship with someone from Russia (Ukraine, Belarus, Kazakhstan) and you are paying for each message, stop and think.
- There is no such thing as “mail order brides” from these countries. Dating there works exactly the same as in your motherland: People who meet online immediately switch to chatting through multiple free apps, such as Viber, Whatsapp, Skype, etc.
- Russian and Ukrainian women speak English: Maybe not perfectly, but they can maintain a reasonable level of communication. Everyone knows about and uses Google Translate.
- Ensure that your relationship is real. You need a mobile phone number of the person you are talking to and be able to see them on camera in real time (Skype). You should be able to reach them at different times and days.
- Russian, Ukrainian women are not submissive or passive. They are usually educated and smart.
- Internet access is not a luxury there but a fact of everyday life.
- Slavic women are not desperate to immigrate to America, UK, or Australia. If they list their profiles with (real) international dating sites (non-PPL), they seek to meet nice guys, not some men who could be their fathers.
To get a better picture of how real relationships with Russian, Ukrainian women work, check my latest eBook. It also lists tips for men who think about visiting Russia or Ukraine, what’s the best way to organize your trip.